Grandpa was in the hospital, and my husband and I were still fighting

2022-08-24 0 By

When talking with my husband on the phone, because of some things at home, both of them did not control their temper well. He was impatient with me, and I also gave him a few fierce words.In the end, though, we tried to steady our nerves, said a few words and then hung up.I’m talking about my husband’s grandpa.He is very impatient of my attitude, because I think grandpa just can not move, speak not clear, the hospital to see his age does not accept, let back home.But what he said was that grandpa had a cerebral hemorrhage of 60 ml and was already dying. If he was really informed by the hospital to return to his hometown, he could only wait for death.The specific situation is that grandpa lives alone in his hometown. A few days ago, he fell down at home. He was found at two o ‘clock in the afternoon by a neighbor who went to visit him.The doctor diagnosed a cerebral hemorrhage, but Grandpa is over 80 years old and is not suitable for surgery.If the family insists on surgery, he really can’t get off the operating table.We can only give him fluids for a few days, take a picture and see what happens.To the results, really not ideal, the hospital can only inform the family to take the old man home, waiting.Wait for what? Wait for death.Grandpa now speak in a vague mind, eat and drink not into, can only rely on infusion to maintain, the body also because of the friction on the ground out of a lot of scars, see uncle hair in the group of photos, shocking.I don’t know if he feels pain, if the wound hurts, if he is afraid of death, and what it feels like when he lies in a hospital bed, but I feel very uncomfortable.My own grandfather died during the pandemic, and I was unable to return home to see him one last time or attend his funeral.The relatives in the home, at that time were beside him, I with aunt video, the in the mind is very uncomfortable.For a moment, I felt like I was lying there.What would it feel like to know that you were going to die, that you were going to die?Is it to face it calmly, or is it to be afraid of death, to be haunted by fear until you leave?Until then, we don’t know how we feel.But looking at relatives like that, the heart is really uncomfortable.Now it’s my husband’s grandfather, my mother-in-law’s father.In this case, they can only go home and lie down, waiting by their children.Grandpa is the last to die, the children around him is the last in the world, keep next to do a filial piety.I’ve had a lot of old people die in the past two years.If I was not sensible and had no idea about the death of an old man when I was young, I would have a deep sense of powerlessness and fear after I had my own family and children.The fear, of course, is not knowing when death will come.The best way is to die like an old man in the family, with his children all around him to take a last look and then leave.Whether happy or not, have no regret, at least there are people around to accompany, do not have to endure the torture of long illness.The worst is, as we say, tomorrow or the unexpected.What would happen if something happened earlier than tomorrow, children and relatives.We often don’t talk about death.The adults and old people around are the same. They don’t talk about this topic or take the initiative to mention things in this regard, just like a taboo in our hearts.It is not until someone is dying that the breath of death begins to spread and people begin to talk about similar topics and old rules to be followed.However, after the funeral, everything returns to normal, as if the person who left does not exist, does not affect our life.And those of us who are still alive will not be affected by those who are leaving. We continue to work, make money, worry and live as the earth spins on its axis.Where there is new, there is old; where there is cause, there is effect; where there is birth, there is death.This is the constant law of nature for thousands of years, and no one can do anything about it.No one wants to die prematurely, but they will.Especially in the face of the death of their loved ones, the older the more difficult to let go, the more I feel can do really limited.​